Symbolic Gestures
There are so many different gestures or rituals that you can include in your day of celebration – regardless of the ceremony type. See below for some ideas – and I would be very happy to discuss ideas of your own too!
Include symbols or rituals to your special day
Combining of Sand
This could be sand from around the world, from a beach near where you were born, a favourite holiday spot or anywhere else that holds special significance for you. Or you might just choose to buy different coloured sand, where the colours all represent something important to you or your loved one. This is a lovely ritual – which is very popular with children, too – so maybe you have some little ones that could get involved?! The finished product can end up taking pride of place in your home, to help you remember your special day for ever.
Ring-warming
This involves the couple placing their rings in a pouch or box – which then gets passed around, with their guests all getting the chance to touch the rings and give the couples wishes or prayers.
Candle-lighting
Special candles with wording on them can be bought, but equally they can be any candle of your choice. This is a great way to involve significant family members of friends, and possibly children (under supervision!). This ritual is often chosen by people that want a quiet, meaningful and visual gesture that bridges secular and spiritual meaning.
The herb circle
Herbs have long been symbols of healing, protection, and prosperity. A circle of herbs like rosemary (remembrance), thyme (courage), lavender (calm) and basil (love) represents a couple’s intention to build a home filled with peace, growth and shared strength. Before the ceremony, we would create a small circle of fresh herbs on the ground where the couple will stand. I would explain the meaning of each herb as the couple steps inside the circle, grounding the ceremony in intention. Afterwards, herbs can be dried and gifted as sachets to guests or kept as a keepsake in the couple’s home.
Hand-fasting
This is a beautiful, ancient ritual where a couple’s hands are gently bound together with cords or ribbons to symbolise their union. It dates back to Celtic and Norse traditions and is the origin of the phrase “tying the knot.” Handfasting usually happens after vows and before (or instead of) the ring exchange. Cords or ribbons in meaningful colours are wrapped around the couple’s hands while the celebrant speaks words of blessing or symbolism. It can involve friends or family and the tied knot can be kept as a keepsake. This is a visually symbolic and deeply personal ritual.
The message capsule
This ritual represents the ongoing journey of love - acknowledging that marriage is not just about the wedding day but about growing together over time. Before the ceremony, the couple writes love letters to each other, not to be read yet. During the ceremony, they seal the letters (sometimes along with a bottle of wine or small keepsakes) into a box or capsule. I would explain that the couple will open the capsule on a future anniversary - or during a moment when they need a reminder of their bond. Guests can also write short notes of love or advice and place them in the capsule, making it a collective gift of support.